Pitru Paksha comes with its own pressure: the right tithi, the right names, the right order of tarpan. A pandit knows the sequence and can guide you through it, so you can concentrate on remembering the person you are honouring.
Why it is done
Pitru Paksha is a fortnight in the lunar calendar when many families remember their ancestors with tarpan, pind offerings and a meal in their memory. The ritual is an act of gratitude and remembrance. Details differ by region and family.
Who it is for
Families who observe shraddh for a parent or grandparent; people who are doing it for the first time and are unsure of the vidhi; households who want a pandit to lead tarpan.
When to do it
Many families perform it during the Pitru Paksha fortnight on the tithi of the person's passing, and some on Sarva Pitru Amavasya. Your pandit can help work out the tithi. Your family's custom takes priority.
Choose your ceremony
About 1 hour for the standard ceremony; about 1.5 hours for the extended one.
- Live video puja: A live video Pitru Paksha puja works if the family is abroad or in another city: the pandit leads on video and you follow along at home. You arrange the samagri yourself, and a helper at home makes the ritual easier. You will need water, sesame and a helper at home.
- Standard: About 1 hour with one pandit and 15 vidhi steps. It covers sankalp, remembrance of ancestors, tarpan and bhog.
- Extended: About 1.5 hours with one pandit and 22 vidhi steps. It adds pind offerings and further rituals. The pandit confirms what is included.
Choose the standard for tarpan. Choose the extended if your family also does pind offerings and a fuller shraddh.
Choose 'With samagri' and the pandit brings the ritual items. Choose 'Own samagri' if you already have them or prefer to buy them yourself. Tarpan items such as sesame, kusha and water are simple, but ask the pandit for the list.
The sequence
- Purification and sankalp with gotra and names
- Prayers to Vishnu or Narayan for a calm start
- Remembrance of the ancestors
- Tarpan with water and sesame, as per custom
- Pind offerings, in the extended ceremony
- Offerings to the deities and rishis
- Bhog in memory of the ancestors
- Closing prayers
How to prepare
- Confirm the tithi with the pandit or your family's calendar
- Note the gotra and the names of those being remembered
- Prepare a simple, sattvic bhog if your custom includes it
- Keep a clean area, a tray for water and a plate for offerings
- Keep a safe spot for a diya, with water nearby
- Decide who will sit for the rituals, as per custom
Who should attend
Usually the eldest son or the head of the household, but families decide this for themselves. Relatives can join for the closing prayers.
Your tradition
The tithi rules, the foods offered and who sits differ across regions. Some families travel to Gaya, Haridwar or Varanasi. Tell us your tradition at booking.
Safety
The ritual uses water and a diya. Water can make floors slippery, so keep a tray and cloth ready, and keep the flame away from curtains, children and pets.
Questions
How long should I plan for? About 1 hour for the standard ceremony and about 1.5 hours for the extended one, plus setup.
How do we know which day to do it? Many families use the tithi of passing. The pandit can help work it out.
Is tarpan different from pind daan? Tarpan is an offering of water; pind involves rice balls. Many families do both. Ask the pandit.
Can we do it outside Pitru Paksha? Customs differ. Ask the pandit about your situation.
What food is offered? It differs by family. A simple vegetarian meal is common.